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February 15 2009

The Trojan Vibrating Touch Makes My Skin Crawl… And Not In A Good Way

vibrating touchLate night commercials are sometimes just annoying, but at other times they can be down right disturbing.

Have you had the… er… pleasure yet of seeing the TV add for the Trojan Vibrating Touch?   If you have missed this gem, you can see it here as I’m not particularly in the mood to embed it on my site.   Essentially this is a “fingertip massager” released by Trojan, who is best known for their condoms.   Why they felt the need for this product to be added to their line-up of offerings is truly beyond me, but for whatever reason it has been, and now we get really awkward commercials for it that air late at night on cable channels.

I’ve debated about writing this up before, but always decided the commercial wasn’t “that bad” and left it alone. Well, the frequency with which I see it has increased, so I went to check out their site finally, and I was greeted with the image you see in this post. “Makes a Great Valentine’s Day Gift”.

Really?  Are you kidding me? Can you imagine the look on your girlfriend’s/wife’s face when she would open up this gift on the purportedly most romantic day of the year?

Woman: Oh, darling, you didn’t have to get me another gift!  The roses, dinner and chocalates were enough!

Man: Well, you deserve it, sweetie!  Open it up!

Woman: -opens up the gift… stares in the box-

Man: Do you like it?

Woman: Well, the message this is sending to me is that you aren’t man enough to get the job done, so, guess I won’t be needing your jobless behind any more.  I’m breaking up with you.

Seriously, can you imagine a worst present that would send more mixed signals to a loved one?  Buying this as a “gift” at any other time would be bad enough, but I really question the sanity of any one who gave it on Valentine’s Day.



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  • Grasshopper

    Tsk, tsk. I for one would be pleased with this as a gift.

  • Oh GREAT! Thanks for totally blowing my theory, Grasshopper ;)

  • You need to go to bed earlier

  • I'm replying to this at 3:15 AM…

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  • catchxthexclock

    Honestly, I think it would depend entirely on the person. I know a lot of women who would love this as a gift. Not to be rude, but I know women who can't reach a climax without the aid of sex toys. For whatever reason- whether it be that they are too inhibited, or just that normal stimulation won't get them there, these sort of products come in handy. Especially if they have a partner. When you're with someone and they can't climax, it can be a huge insecurity and can drive a wedge into an intimate relationship. So for them, this wouldn't be an insult, but something that they could both enjoy, which would assist in bringing them closer together.

  • Scott

    this thing sucks!

    first they don't tell you until AFTER you have made the purchase that the battery ONLY last 30 minutes. I don't know about you – but I don't know a woman on the planet that likes foreplay or "alone time" to last less than 30 minutes!

    second – my girlfriend says it sucks – doesnt work well without putting pressure which is not very comfortable – she hated it.

  • Avocado

    A vibrator can be a great gift for all the reasons catchxthexclock discussed. I would love to have a boyfriend who was secure and open enough to buy me a sex toy! That said, this thing sounds like a piece of crap — a 30 minute battery? WTF? A good vibe would make a great gift, a bad vibe would make a terrible gift.

  • Chris

    Wow, you are completely ignorant. Delete your blog and go experience life.

    • Sean P. Aune

      This coming from someone who just left a comment on a blog post written over 19 months ago … and I need to get out more?

  • carol

    so do it really work

  • just came across this blog, I know it’s like 3 years old, it really made me laugh, I’m assuming it was wrote as a joke.

    • Yes, it was meant as a joke. Glad you enjoyed it!